


The Cherry Stem

by darknalp



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: (It's my first fic guys go easy on me), M/M, POV Third Person- but in America's head, Post-Cold War, Suggestive, goofy but serious but goofy, just a little spicy, references to current events (a la Russian hacking and Brexit etc), there was an attempt at humor, there was an attempt at seduction, they just can't help themselves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-30
Updated: 2020-01-04
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:02:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,878
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22028266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darknalp/pseuds/darknalp
Summary: America attempts to seduce Russia to get information out of him. Wonder how that works out.((Let me enjoy my clichés))
Relationships: America/Russia (Hetalia)
Comments: 14
Kudos: 86





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> How historic! This is my first-ever fanfiction I’ve written for anything ever!  
> So, my apologies if i don’t do something correctly or it sucks. I haven't written anything creative in a bajillion years, and I’m sure it shows.  
> Also I got into this fandom relatively late, but boy did I catch up fast lol. 
> 
> This takes place in the present, yet I must insist that in this story Alfred’s boss be a fictional one or one of your choosing.
> 
> I’d like to improve, so criticism is much appreciated!

Alfred needed information.

He echoed his boss’s request in his mind as he trudged out of his office and down the hall. But how the hell was he going to get it?

Neurons fired as the nation got onto the elevator, when what could only be described as a deafening roar echoing from his stomach jolted him from his thoughts. Alfred looked at his watch and decided to stop at a cafe for lunch, where he began to formulate a plan.

His stomach lurched as he pictured his intended target’s hulking appearance and creepy smile. Alfred made a face. That Russian bastard was going to make things difficult, wasn't he? Russia would never just give vital information up, especially not to America.

The bespectacled blond leaned on his arm and proceeded to stir 6 sugars into his coffee. In a perfect world, Alfred thought sourly, he'd go in guns a-blazing and obtain what he needed to by force. He’d get payback for all of Russia’s meddling in his election. Clearly the Russian thought he could fuck with America and get inside his head. Well then, he’d do the same and infiltrate that giant’s system right under his big nose.

But, Alfred sighed, in this time of relative "peace,” there seemed no way to justify a clandestine ground operation. Though he’d never admit it, he was never very good at sneaking around anyway.

The blond crossed his arms and leaned his chin down, pouting. There WAS another way, but he was trying his hardest not to think about it...

Seduce Russia?

The nation blushed at the thought. But then again, his boss had all but implied it. “Get on his good side,” he’d said. What else was that supposed to mean?

Alfred scoffed. Well excuse his boss, but he did NOT see the Russian that way, he thought with utter conviction. In saying this, however, Alfred made sure to ignore dozens of Cold War innuendos and fights with close bodily contact that lasted just a bit too long.

No. Alfred was sure he could count on one hand the number of positive encounters he’d had with that freak since he turned Red. Now that the conflict was over, even though times had changed, everyone knew that any trust built up between them was all but a ruse for the sake of civility. They’d be at each other’s throats if they could.

Knowing this, getting close to Russia would be as easy as trying to hug to a cactus. Alfred abruptly snorted as he pictured a mini potted cactus sporting Ivan’s smiling features, signature scarf, and two outgrowths for arms. He would keep the Slavic succulent on a windowsill, Alfred mused, where he’d never be a thorn in his side again. Ha! Good pun.

Ok, he was clearly getting distracted.

The truth was that he’d never really done anything like this before. He was understandably a little nervous. Puritan roots combined with rampant hookup culture had done a confusing number on Alfred’s brain when it came to sex. Even so, he had to be brave.

How could he call himself a hero if he couldn’t do this one little thing? It wouldn’t mean anything! He wouldn’t _really_ be giving anything up. And he was a sexy beast, right? Besides, Alfred figured, if he succeeded, he‘d finally have a leg up on Russia (a/n: *wriggles eyebrows*).

Alfred imagined what it would be like to manipulate Ivan into giving him what he wanted with his wily ways. Once he had the bastard wrapped around his little finger, he’d instantly drop the facade and saunter away in victory, leaving the Russian a confused and horny mess.

When he'd go to give his boss the news, the city would undoubtedly throw a grand parade in his honor. He’d gleefully wave to his citizens as a woman would hold out her infant and cry, “Oh, Mr. America, you’re so amazing! Would you mind signing my baby?”

Whipping out a pen, he’d puff out his chest and reply, “Not at all, ma’am. All in a day’s work.” Finally Alfred would triumphantly walk up to his boss to shake his hand and receive a medal, all to the sound of thunderous applause.

Alright, Alfred decided, he’d do it. Now he just had to get some signature moves together...  
  



	2. Chapter 2

-Russia’s office, three days later-

  
Ivan sat at his desk, brow furrowed and lips reduced to a thin line. He stared at one of many of a tall stack of files in deep concentration.

_The following proposal would render the I-59A clause obsolete in regards to any of conditions listed above. Any citizen wishing to..._

Ivan pondered the implications of the statement before signing the bottom of the page. He'd resolved to finish this pile before lunch. With a sigh, Ivan picked up the next document and started reading.

Suddenly the door burst open to reveal a certain smirking American, who struck a dramatic pose against the doorway.

“Howdy there, bear man,” Alfred uttered in what he imagined was a sultry tone.

Wholly unfazed, Russian continued to read the manuscript before him, following the words with his capped pen.

A shadow of bewilderment crept into Alfred’s confident expression. He cleared his throat insistently. Still nothing. A good three minutes passed in silence, neither willing to yield.

Finally, with a huff, Alfred abandoned his position at the door and sauntered across the room. “I said,” Alfred promptly climbed up onto Ivan’s desk, attempting to look scrumptious as he knocked over desk supplies, “how’s it going, hot stuff?”

Ivan still didn’t look up. “What do you want, Alfred?” he asked calmly.

The American absentmindedly ran his hand through his hair. “What, can’t one handsome, buff, charming, consenting individual have a simple conversation with another?”

“Ah, but you forget, I did not consent to this conversation.” Ivan chided mockingly with a venom-laced smile, finally meeting the younger nation’s eyes.

Returning a smile of his own, Alfred cocked his head and leaned in, coquettish. “Oh, but you should. I can be a very exciting conversationalist.”

“You’ll forgive me if past experience has made me skeptical.”

“Sure, I'll forgive you. I’m an understanding guy,” Alfred winked.

Just then, without breaking eye contact, Alfred extended his hand and swatted an empty pencil cup onto the floor to join the rest of the fallen items.  
“Oops, silly me.”

Alfred cheerfully hopped off the desk, dropping to his hands and knees and crawling through the space in the middle of the desk up to where Ivan was sitting. He slid his hands up Ivan’s thighs, using them to steady himself as he looked for the cup on either side of Ivan’s chair. With a sigh, Alfred leaned back onto his knees, his hands running back down the length of the Russian’s legs.

Alfred turned his big blue eyes up to Ivan. “I don’t see it,” he pouted.

With no great effort, Ivan leaned to pick up the cup from where it lay directly next to his chair. He held it up to Alfred’s face.

“Oh! Vanya, you’re so clever,” Alfred praised, snatching the cup and standing up in front of Ivan from his spot on the floor. He took this opportunity to plant himself sideways on Ivan’s lap and curl an arm around the Russian.

Alfred carefully placed the cup on the desk and sighed, “Oh Vanya, you know, I miss hanging out with you. We used to have so much fun.” He playfully tugged at Ivan’s tie, twirling it in between his fingers.

“We’ve never hung out. We’ve been enemies for the past century,” Ivan pointed out flatly. “That is of course unless you consider beating each other to a pulp whilst threatening nuclear holocaust ‘hanging out’. If that is the case, then I miss you as well.”

Alfred stared at the other before managing a sheepish laugh. He searched for a change in the subject.

“Oh!” Alfred exclaimed. “Did you know, this has always been my favorite tie of yours.”

“I bought this last week.”

...“—Oh well, yeah, I mean it’s always been my favorite since last week.”

After a moment Alfred leaned in and murmured, “it makes you look like you know what you’re doing.” He tugged the tie tightly.

Ivan let himself be pulled and smiled pleasantly, “Well I’ll let you borrow it then. I’m sure you could use it.” Ivan reached across Alfred to take a sip out of his coffee mug.

Alfred’s eye twitched. This was taking too long. He decided to go in for the kill. “You know, some people mistake our animosity for attraction,” Alfred ventured. “I can’t imagine why...”

Suddenly he reached into his pocket and pulled out a single cherry stem. Emphasizing his every move, Alfred placed the stem in his mouth and maneuvered it around with his tongue in an attempt to tie a knot. Finally succeeding, Alfred displayed the knotted stem with a crooked grin before promptly dropping it into Ivan’s coffee.

Alfred put his mouth to Ivan’s ear and whispered, “If you ever wanna get reacquainted, you can call me. I’m sure we can find lots of interesting things to talk about.”

With that Alfred stood up and sauntered back to the doorway. He paused as he reached for the knob, his back to Ivan. “I do miss you, ya know,” he added before finally shutting the door.

One eyebrow quirked, Ivan directed his attention away from the door and down to the mug in his hand. He fished out the cherry stem and stared at it before tossing it aside with a shrug and drinking anyway.

Ivan searched through the mess on his desk for the document he left off on and resumed reading, the faintest hint of a smile on his face.


	3. Chapter 3

-World Meeting, 2 weeks later-

  
“I mean I just don’t understand why you can’t just, I dunno, have another vote on it? Everyone and their mother’s cousin’s dentist can see it was a mistake.” America conversed with England as they walked into the meeting room together.

“It’s not that simple, America,” England replied warily as they took their seats. “Such a reversal would require a series of-“

Alfred didn’t mean to zone out as Arthur recounted to him the intricacies of parliamentary politics and protocol, but he couldn’t help it as soon as his eyes fell on a certain Russian across the table. He hadn’t gotten a word from Ivan these past 2 weeks. What was that guy’s deal?

Russia sat attentively, making the occasional comment to Ukraine, who sat next to him. He must have felt Alfred’s glare on him because he suddenly turned to meet the American’s eyes. Ivan smiled pleasantly at Alfred before directing his attention back to the front of the room.

Alfred was perplexed. Was that it?? What was Ivan playing at? Had he not gotten the message Alfred was trying to send? He thought he’d been pretty clear.

Or, maybe this was Ivan’s answer...  
Maybe he’d been rejected and wouldn’t have to go through with it after all.

Honestly Alfred felt a little relieved. Yet, a deep part of him, a part he refused to acknowledge, was disappointed. This was not to mention how much his pride stung at the thought of putting himself out there and getting nothing in return. Alfred stared intently at the scratches on the table in front of him.

“-and that would be preposterous, don’t you think? America? Hello?” Arthur sighed. “Why am I not at all surprised..." "Hey! Alfred, look! They’re selling those limited edition Avengers themed PS4’s!”

“What, where?! Those weren’t supposed to be out for another month! Those lying bastards.”

The countries continued to babble until Ludwig called the meeting to order, a session that for once turned out to be surprisingly productive. Alfred gave not another thought to the Ivan situation, that is, until after the meeting was over...

-

As the meeting came to a close, Ivan was watching Alfred pack his things when he observed multiple countries stay behind to talk to the American. Ivan pretended to look over his meeting notes as he waited for them to finish. Time passed, and with the words from his notes having become seared into his brain and the group still bloody talking, Ivan was just about getting fed up with sitting there. Finally, he saw the blond stand up to leave. Perking up instantly, the Russian hastily stuffed his things in his briefcase (in a manner he’d normally find unacceptable) and followed shortly after Alfred as nonchalantly as he could.


	4. Chapter 4

As Alfred strolled down the hall, he stopped for a drink at the water fountain, deep in thought about the many tasks he had to complete before the next meeting.

“Hello, America.”

Alfred jumped. He turned to see Ivan leaning against the wall.

“JEEzus! Ivan, what the hell. How long have you been standing here?”

Ivan ignored the questions and started towards the American, complaining, “It took absolutely forever for you to leave. Did you really have to speak to all those countries?”

“Hey, it’s not my fault they all have issues with me! So uh, did you...did you want something?”

Ivan stopped in front of Alfred and Alfred somehow found himself against the wall.

Ivan shrugged. “Did you not want an answer to your offer?”

“Oh! Yes! My offer, yes. I mean- uh,” Alfred scrambled before he managed to slip into sultry mode, “so~ you’ve thought about it? Really got you goin, huh~”

“Oh Alfred,” Ivan sing-songed, “you really shouldn’t go around saying such things. People might think you mean it.”

Eyes wide, Alfred jumped to defend himself, “but I do mean it, I do!”

Ivan’s hands met the wall, surrounding Alfred and effectively trapping him. He leaned in slowly while Alfred continued to babble.

“What makes you think I wasn’t being serious? I'm a very serious person. I can be very ser-iou s...” Alfred trailed off as Ivan’s lips met his collarbone.

Alfred froze.

Gently kissing, Ivan explored his neck. He pressed his lips insistently beneath Alfred’s chin, pushing the blond still further into the wall.

Alfred swallowed and whispered, “Are you-”

Ivan cut him off as he continued his expedition along his jaw.

‘This is happening right now.’ Alfred’s brain tried to comprehend the position he was in. He was doing it. His plan was working! Ivan was kissing him. Woah. Ivan was _kissing_ him. You know, it wasn’t that bad. Actually, it was kinda great.

After what felt like hours but could only have been a minute, Alfred found he just couldn’t shake the feeling that something about this just felt... _right_. Alfred’s eyes fluttered shut.

Ivan soon reached his destination and playfully enclosed his teeth around the American’s ear, causing Alfred to bite his lip in an effort to stifle a small sound. Finally the Russian exhaled into Alfred’s hair to recollect himself, sending a shiver down the shorter man’s spine.

When Ivan pulled back, both nations stared at each other with heaving breaths and dilated pupils. Ivan waited, eyes posing a silent question.

Alfred decided he was tired of thinking.

Without ceremony, he crashed his lips into Ivan’s. His hands tangled eagerly into pale Russian locks.

Ivan chuckled into the kiss, responding in kind. He encircled Alfred’s waist and held him tightly, trapping the American once more.

The next few minutes became a fury of roaming hands, intertwining tongues, and tangled limbs. Simply basking in each other’s closeness, their movements grew increasingly feverish and their groans ever more breathless.

Alfred was the first to speak, when Ivan finally let go of his mouth in favor of attacking his throat once more. “Nnmmh, I can't believe this is happening,” he breathed.

Ivan gave a languid reply into his neck, “Aren’t you the one who started this?”

“Ahh-I just couldn't help myself.”

Ivan moved to face Alfred with a playful glint in his eyes. “Well, we all know self-control is not one of your strong suits.”

Alfred scoffed. “Oh, shut up, no more games.” He pulled Ivan in by the collar for another bruisingly wet kiss.  
  


“Does anyone ever tell you how beautiful your eyes are?” Ivan asked Alfred between kisses.

Alfred breathed out a laugh. “Haha, only every single other person I meet.”

“Hmm, I see they seem to be going to your head.”

“But my—oh jeez, that feels good—my eyes are already in my head...”

Ivan paused to shake his head before moving to continue where he left off. “God, you're so stupid.”

Alfred pulled back to look straight up at Ivan, his arms remaining around the Russian’s neck. “And you're insane,” he countered matter-of-factly.

“Well,” Ivan smirked, “I think we both know we're not exactly what people say we are.”

Alfred shrugged. “How should I know? I clearly know nothing, and why should I believe a word that comes out of a crazy man's mouth?”

Both men stared at each other for a moment, smiling.

Ivan lifted Alfred up so the blond could wrap his legs around the Russian’s waist. “Touché.”

  
  
~And the rest was history (get it, cuz they’re nations). It looked like Alfred’s boss would have to wait a little longer to find out Russia’s ultra top-secret chocolate chip cookie recipe after all.~


End file.
